Am I OK alone? Mmmm. I want to answer yes. In in my mind I say yes, while in my heart I ask: What does it mean for me to be alone? Mmmm. That’s a bit tricky. I pause and I observe. I am uncertain. Mmmm. When I feel alone I am uncertain. I am …
Living with Uncertainty makes slogging through the forest more than can be tolerated sometimes. Trees and bushes obscuring the way, blocking the view not only of the path but the intended goal. Not seeing the goal pulls up questions which poke and prod uncomfortably. Am I on the right trail? Am I heading in the …
Limen, from Latin: threshold Liminal. At the threshold. In the space between being and becoming. Moving past what is, not quite to what will be. In the Liminal, there is all and there is nothing. All possibility, no creation, not yet. In the Liminal, there are no rules, standards, or expectations. Absent are requirements, codes, …
The Communion of Remembrance reflects on the nature of community and what brings us together. Remembrance: an act or ritual of mindfulness, done in respect, to remember Communion: intimate, shared spiritual and emotional gathering of mindful individuals When we gather together mindfully, meaning each individual brings awareness to self and to the many gathered, we …
I am Cheryl Marlene! Sometimes the simple shifts in life bring the most profound change. This was the case for me with my name. During divorce, it was the huge task of shifting all my published books into a new name which held me back from a name change. But as time wore on, I …
Life can be so chaotic, pulling in multiple directions at once, pushing to find many places to stand and experience. Between the push and the pull is the point to bring awareness. Instead of blindly reacting to push or to pull, find the place of balance in your heart. In this moment is the opportunity …
Defiance at the Crossroads describes the roadblock I met in wanting to climb a mountain. One word: Construction. After four months of training, hiking, sweating, hurting and learning towards one goal, the journey up Mt. Defiance came to an abrupt halt. Delayed construction at the trail head reversed the Oregon Department of Transportation’s decision to …
She pauses in the stillness of spiritual space between the energetic flow of in and out. Finding that same peace in physical space
Excerpt: My Edges, I am finding, are useful in defining boundaries, for clarity and depth. I am learning to open to the experience of life at the edge.
Abandonment is the energetic response to feeling emotionally and/or physically left. The paradox is that abandonment usually comes because honest energy flow never truly showed up in the relationship and the absence of honesty was never challenged. The feeling of being abandoned is more a result of a string of actions rather than one primary …
Hiking is Heaven! The beginning, somewhat at odds with the rest of the day, is a concrete parking structure, third floor on the left. We all assemble with excited anticipation. A few known to each other but mostly all strangers, newly assembled with the goal of enjoying a hike. For me, I have joined other …
Let go came the guidance. Though standing in the middle of yoga, the words felt more like admonishment. Plus, how? I am in the middle of a posture, trying desperately to hold the form, straining muscle, holding in my tummy. What exactly do I let go while remaining in this form?
When I learned to read at 6 years old, my proud grandparents celebrated my newly acquired skill by giving me my very own red leather Bible. A Christmas gift offered with a reverence and a respect that I had already learned from both of them. They were so delighted with me and their offering brought me into a circle of knowledge and spiritual connection that they had both known their entire lives. I treasured this gift, willingly shared from the depths of their hearts.
Cross human nature with Mother Nature and the depth of life experience is intensified. When I touch the earth, her deep soul reaches into my body filling my cells, illuminating my being. When I breathe the forest or feel the ocean’s mist, connection is established which reflects to me my entire experience of stepping out …
When I speak in confidence to another I want to trust that my inner thoughts shared privately are not publicly displayed. My expectation is my secret is kept. Yet underneath is a place where keeping secrets is hurtful and harmful and will undermine the health and integrity of a relationship. Especially when the secret kept hides a truth aching to be revealed.
It would be easy to say that what happened today was coincidence. Meaning that there was simply chance or happenstance involved. A fluke. Instead I believe today was one of synchronicity. For me this means that why it appears that there are no causal links, connections across multiple levels stared me in the face. I couldn?t ignore any of it. For the me the difference between coincidence and synchronicity is that a catalyst is present in the second and not so much in the first. Coincidence happens without intention or pre-planning. Synchronicity is an alignment ignited or sparked by the flow of energy within a situation, often between the folks involved.
If it?s true that my marriage was to a boy who expected me to do the emotional heavy lifting in our relationship, then it follows that I have never been in a mature adult relationship with a man ? especially one who is willing and able to show up and risk sharing vulnerable, emotional intimacy. And if this is true, then it follows that even though I may have the capacity to reciprocate maturely, I have at best limited experience. And, OMG! I don?t want to screw up the next relationship. I don?t want to get in my own way or scare away potentials or fail to recognize reasonable signals because of a lack of experience. My heart feels so open and so ready to dive deeply and fully and completely and I?m not sure if I know how.
Sitting at the back door of my college dorm. That?s the day I joined the ranks. I remember clearly I was on my way to the library on a Saturday afternoon. As I stepped out the door, the wind caught and slammed the door against the wall. I looked up into the sky catching the swirling gray-green of thunder clouds and the warm wet scent of approaching turbulence. Damn! I thought. It?s going to rain.
Several weeks ago, I participated in the second of 10 training hikes designed to prepare for the highest climb in the Columbia Gorge. At 11 miles in length and almost 5000 feet of elevation gain, Mount Defiance poses a sizeable challenge to most hikers and thus the plan of training hikes to build the endurance …
Perhaps an odd statement: human nature is exploratory. Let me explain! I’ve been hiking a lot lately which has me wading through hike descriptions and learning a new lingo. The exploratory hike is an adventure that is new to the hike leader. Either never hiked the chosen path or deciding to attempt it in a …