No Give, No Take

No Give, No Take explore an aspect of sacred relationship about loosing self just to have connection.


I’m done with takers. No more!

I’m done especially with men who do nothing more than take from me.

I know most of them have no idea the extent of their taking caught as they are in the outdated energy of give and take.

But that’s not an acceptable excuse — certainly not good enough for me to give up me.

I am also done being a giver.

My participation in this world is so much broader and deeper.

I am not a giver, letting myself go to any taker who appears in front of me.

Nope! Done with this give-give-give mode of relationship.

Taking comes from the ideas of power-over, fear, and the belief that love is scarce.

This has been the traditional male role: take to control, take to establish power, take to induce fear.

And as a woman, I have been trained and indoctrinated that my role is giver.

To be a woman is to be a giver, a selfless nurturer, finding self-satisfaction through the happiness of others. I am exhorted to give up power, give up control, give up to reduce fear.

To escape being the victim of whoever might want to exert power over me.

I am responsible for me.

I make choices for myself. I decide how to live my life.

And, here, now, I say no to giver.

No more. I am no longer a giver and I refuse to concede to the game of give and take.

Because if I am a giver then the men who come into my life will be takers.

And as I have said already, I’m done with takers.

If I’m done with the relationship model of give and take, then what is available within my desire for healthy, vital, sacred relationship? Sacred relationship comes out of balance and is beyond the control and dictates of fear and power over.

In fact, it is about the balance of personal power. A balance in the ebb and flow. A balance where love is freely exchanged.

A relationship where each person offers and receives.

Gone are the power dynamics of dominance. Instead both share a willingness to offer the best of self to the other and receive a lovingly offered flow in return.

That’s what I want: a man who will offer the best of himself in his search for the best of me.

And that’s what I want from me: an offering of the best of me and my ability to receive the best of him.

No longer a giver.

I receive. I offer. I am fully me in this balance of relationship which creates us.


This is an article among many in which explore relationship. For a deep dive, begin with What is Sacred Relationship?

To find my books, begin with my Amazon Author Page.

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Cheryl Marlene
Cheryl Marlene, Akashic Mystic, is unafraid of the tough, the raw, and the real aspects of doing deep work. She is the world’s authority on the Akashic Records and consults in the Akashic Records with clients around the world through readings, research, and executive programs. Student learn to access the Akashic Records through ZENITH, her comprehensive four-level learning program, and her signature classic, The Akashic Records Masterclass. In the field of consciousness, she is known as a futurist, innovator, and master teacher who delivers life-changing lessons with warmth and humor. Her powerful exploration is cutting edge -- providing you with deep insight today to ignite your vision for tomorrow.

Headshot of Cheryl Marlene, Spiritual Guide in the Akashic Records

A mystic, futurist, and trailblazer in spiritual consciousness and the Akashic Records, Cheryl is unafraid of the tough, the raw, and the real aspects of doing deep work.

Cheryl has expanded the collective understanding of the Akashic Records beyond the outdated myths of yesterday into a dynamic healing spiritual practice of divine and human consciousness. She consults in the Akashic Records with clients around the world through one-on-one sessions, extensive research, and future-driven, strategic business development.

Cheryl’s clients and students know her as a relatable, funny, everyday person who loves red dresses, urban fantasy books, and skinny margaritas. When she is not hard at work on her next book, she is on the hiking trail listening to the beauty of nature and the heartbeat of the mountain.

Through her journey, she has distilled her intention for life to these seven words: BELIEVE. Laugh. Learn. Love. Be. Become. Always.